Today I started implementing the new schedule that I've spent countless hours putting together. I was using the MOTH approach ala www.titus2.com. I was utterly amazed at how some of it came together. For example, I had no idea exactly what my baby girl's schedule was. I just guessed at it. This morning she took a nap at exactly 11:00 a.m. as scheduled. Maybe she read it?
My 2-year-old apparently did NOT read the new schedule. Mommy was excited to have "toddler time" using all the great materials she's collected over the years and severely under used. The toddler had his own ideas for how to use that time. UGH. I should have let him direct that time, right? I will keep options available, but will let him choose.
I am sorry to say that I lost my temper today. Between repeated temper tantrums, the usual fighting between the middle boys, and my oldest insisting on playing with his eyelid skin (this is akin to scratching a chalkboard to me), I had had it.
But I was recharged when my niece arrived to watch the kids for my first errand day. I shopped...for ME! I bought some non-frumpy clothes and I was delighted. I also decided to refill my gas tank every Monday. What I've done in the past is put it off until I can enjoy the heart-pounding thrill of wondering if I will arrive at the pump on fumes. :-)
Somehow I have to wonder how God endures so patiently with me. Here I am with my neat little schedule and my plans and expectations. And He's waiting there for me to acknowledge that HE has a schedule and plans and expectations for me and they don't necessarily mesh with mine. I used to think that when Jesus said that love was laying down your life for a brother that I was glad I hadn't been called to do that! I haven't rescued anyone from a burning building lately. But I was wrong. I am called to lay down my life every day. I am off to lay me down to sleep now and prepare for school day #2.
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